Victim Arrested

The last line of this makes no sense to me.

It’s absolutely wonderful that women are beating up their harassers, even if the reporter says “he allegedly raped…on the pretext of giving job to her husband” (what is a rape on a pretext?). And even if the reporter is at pains to make himself clear that the harassment is alleged, but writes as if the beating up is all proven fact, the fact that it’s being reported at all is cause for joy.

But place aside the reporters reportage and look at what the police have done* –

…including the victim labourer, who was criminally assaulted by Birajdar have also been arrested under various sections of IPC, police added.

*No, I have no objection to the police adding, only to them arresting victims.


10 Responses

  1. Sleeping with the hiring manager to get her husband a job… qualifies as bribe, I guess, which it would be till rape is proved.

    It’s your kind who find these loopholes anyways.

  2. No, silly! You could well say it qualifies as rape because consent wasn’t freely given, till ‘bribery’ is proved.

  3. This is not quite a comment for this entry alone.

    I once said you saw the last of my part in what you called as ‘campaign against campaign’. Biting my tongue and eating my words aren’t pleasant, but I have to accept what happens naturally. Yeah, that’s my brave man! But I won’t call it a campaign still, just to keep you at the ground level.

    So, Erimentha, where were we? Yes, at the point where you want to dictate—but without actually saying—to all men in your bus what they MUST like about you and what they shouldn’t, what they may stare at and what they mustn’t! Instead of dying to be respected for your bright yet invisible mind, shouldn’t you allow yourself to feel honored that something about you is being appreciated? Reserve the finer aspects in you for your private sphere; this is where you need to thoroughly understand the difference between the public and the private. You know, appreciation is not always a threat, and that’s where a brain helps, in making that judgement! Why are your kind bent on making appreciative men feel guilty and forced into sly stares? Sacrilege of sacrileges, could you not smile back at them and release the artificial stress? For example, how I wish somebody appreciated something … anything about me! I won’t feel like being owned if I am appreciated, promise!!

    I am also wondering how many minds of men in the bus you, in turn, appreciated till date. (Why just men? You can add women, children, cows on the street, trees up the hillock, wayside rocks also to the list of your subjects!) I am sure it will make an interesting reading for all of us at your blogs. Some of us are curious to know if you are born with that eighth sense about instantly appreciating what mere mortals take decades to figure out—the mind of a stranger. If yours is an acquired art, we won’t mind learning how to acquire it for ourselves too.

    Between us both, Erimentha, I also want to know how it is that you failed to expect resentment, expressed or otherwise, from strangers who are being told what is right, especially when they fear being forced likewise in the long run. Remember that you yourself admitted to resenting being advised to marry, etc., by your very own family!

    You will also have benefited your readers greatly, if, when you have the time, you can explain the connection between your feminism and your attitude towards men. (No, drooling over a John Abraham hasn’t quite acquitted that attitude!) Perhaps, some of us are flagrantly stupid, but are still curious to know about your attitude towards those strangers, who don’t even know you exist (“Do you exist, sexist?!” will perhaps be their startled reaction a while later), let alone mean any harm. I can’t recall the word, but what is your kind of phobia called? Certainly, that word can’t be ‘feminism’! Or is it?! (How unedifying, then!!)

    I am sure you too agree that everybody tends to become narrow and closed when deep into one’s work, but do you see that you have become more closed than you probably hoped? How many impressionable young girls (and boys) have you influenced through your profession? Please watch where you are going. Entire lives are being spent figuring out the complexity of human behavior. Some respect, please!

    I am not sure if ‘political is personal’ agrees with the difference between the public and the private. You could try convincing but yourself first! The way I see it is that the public is a statistical entity and exhibits little of the shades seen in an individual person. Your individual relationships are always thus much more diverse and fulfilling than your political life. There is little sense in marginalizing yourself by making political personal. Keep them separate, if you will!

    Enough … because I might as well start my own blog, otherwise.

  4. Mr. You Know, I strongly suggest u do not write such rubbish – people may beat you up if they find out ur identity!!

    Which kind of idiot believes or thinks that a woman should feel honoured that a man is staring at her boobs other than one who does that and justifies it by saying she will feel honoured.

    And believe me most women know when they are given an appreciative look and when they are being letched at!

  5. You Know, that was not a comment on this entry in any sense, but I will not quibble. I will also not use sarcasm, irony or humour in this comment, so that you don’t get distracted from the points I’m making. And, I will write in numbered points, and try to use small words.

    1. I don’t dictate anything to anyone. I am not telling men, or women, what they must or must not do.

    2. I often rail against the fact that men seem to think they own my body – the men who molest me, whether with their eyes, their hands or their penises.

    3. Appreciation is different from molestation. (Yes, long words, but you used the first one yourself, so I’m sure you understand it) If you finally decide that reading is not an evil, read two old posts of mine: and

    4. I don’t think I’ve ever told a stranger “what’s right”, so I fail to see your point about resentment.

    5. My attitude towards men. It’s rather ambivalent, at present. I like most of the individual men I know, because feminist or not, they’re all human. I have never disliked someone only because of his sex, so I think I’m fairly neutral to men as a collective.

    6. Feminism and my attitude to men? You mean drooling over John Abraham (and Vidya Balan too)? Yes, I do some very un-feminist things (like objectifying people) all the time.

    7. I don’t have any known phobias. I was/am afraid of unstable stuff, but hardly to the extent where it’s a phobia. And I don’t think that’s what you’re talking about.

    8. It’s the first time I’ve been accused of being narrow and closed, so let me examine that and not respond to it.

    9. The slogan ‘personal is political’ was coined by feminists to protest at the artificial distinction the State drew between public and private. It’s evolved to now talk of all (not just State-imposed) public-private distinctions. So my ‘political is personal’ is just trying-to-be-clever-and-do-stream-of-consciousness-writing me.

    10. Whether or not you start your own blog, do visit They’re right up your street, figuratively.

  6. Dear You Know,

    This is on behalf of one of the ‘impressionable young girls (and boys)’, who are at the ‘risk’ of being ‘influenced through the profession’ of Erimentha. It would stand you in good stead if you were to give me (and every ‘young’ adult ‘mind’) due credit for an adult with an independent thought process.

    I also speak, as a person who has been subjected to ‘appreciative stares’ and also ‘appreciative comments’ on numerous occasions.
    Something which I fail to appreciate is the ‘appreciative’ nature of those stares and comments. What are we speaking about here? A beautiful vase or an expressive work of art. Or are we considering human beings who are being ‘appreciated’ as an object. The objectification evokes resentment in the object to the ‘appreciation’ which is unparalleled.

    Would stop my self here, as I have a strong suspicion that Dear Mr. YouKnow is hoping to derive vicarious pleasure from the expected outraged responses to his comment.

  7. Right, vicarious pleasure! Why use such shades of vocabulary with someone so thick as to find nothing wrong with the way things were until recently (leaving aside global warming for the moment, not that it is “wrong” either, but …; BTW, how do you get those cool italics working if I want to emphasize something in a comment?)?!

    Anyway, full marks for the psycho-analysis … for expecting me to expect outrage. But that’s precisely the all-pervasive nature of borrowed sadness which is sad!

    There is nothing so secretive about my identity really. I am a relative of Erimentha, but the poor soul, perhaps hoped for more refinement in me when she chose to invite me to her blog, something she hadn’t done with any other from the ‘family’, if I got my facts correct. It also privately came about between us both that if either of us was to be assassinated, I would be the first. So, there you go! What says Erimentha? Anyway …

    As a 15-year-old, I used to take my mother’s side whenever my parents clashed, but over the next decade or so I gradually understood why my mother immediately teamed up with my father and bashed me up each time I interfered. But my father was obviously the bad person—violent, aggressive and cruel, wasn’t he? INCORRECT and -100 points, thank you!

    I grew up in villages and small towns in South India, and I will vouch for a similar pattern in much of semi-urban to rural India. Starting from my adolescence, I lived in cosmopolitan places like most of you. Even though families were noticeably more modern in urban areas, there was that unmistakable pattern which tied people to their roots, which were themselves “constructed” some time during human history. So, women continue to be stared at, women continue to complain about being stared at, etc.

    Complaining about being stared at isn’t a feminist’s creation really! Is it? It is merely an inconsistent artifact of the feminist’s ties to those very roots, which her claim to modernism hasn’t quite erased. (I am generally not trying to be like a lawyer in being excessively correct with my words, but any male feminists will please forgive the wrong pronoun above and elsewhere.)

    What is feminist’s creation, however, is bringing out those complaints into the public, and worse, blaming the entire male category for it, like there is something new about the phenomenon. But like everything else, there is nothing wrong with bringing things into public, except the marginalization (maybe, apparent marginalization is a better description) of the feminist itself, given the energy wasted in fighting against the fundamental nature of things!

    Is a woman’s claim to fame all about being equal to a man? Aren’t women capable of anything but compete with men in all the stupid things they do? Aren’t women capable of much beyond wanting that protection by a government which has nothing but a vote-bank in mind? Indeed, the feminist movement revealed nothing to me that I did not know before! Nothing!! Some venture as much as ask if I understand women! Of course, I don’t understand an individual woman just as much as I don’t understand any individual man other than myself! But what is there to understand about the group as a whole, if I may ask?

    Tomorrow, it is quite possible a law will come in my home country—I am at a loss for words trying to describe my country’s claim to fame, but let it pass—which will make staring at women a punishable crime. The great thing about such laws is that, for example, you don’t even have to define what is considered as perverse staring. All it takes is for an oafish woman to lodge a complaint against a man for staring (who for all the Heaven knows might just be day-dreaming with his eyes fixated dangerously), and immediately, the man will be forced to DISPROVE the charge, in lieu of being imprisoned and fined by DEFAULT! If any one is surprised, go take a look:

    What I am arguing against is making biased policies to cover what is perceived to be not just a majority’s failing but the failing of ALL! (I don’t call it as ‘failing’ if you ask me really, but that’s beside the point for the moment.) Now, what the feminists rejoice turns out to be a bane of all benign adult male persons in India, whether they realize it or not.

    If men are beat up by women somewhere, it’s an unqualified cause for celebration! Why? Have you witnessed what exactly happened or have you merely read what’s been reported? But you don’t have to know what exactly happened, because you know so well what all men are like … Any moment, a woman can blackmail me with impunity! Sweet, isn’t it?!

    Feminism is supposed to have endeared women by erasing misunderstandings about them and by bringing out what they are truly capable of. However, just like communism and many other -isms, it is failing in its objective. It is bound to! Actually, the problem is not with feminism itself but feminism as a uniform policy, where little thinking precedes execution. It has been a problem with all the -isms which became policies. The problem is with the lack of appreciation for shades of personality possible in both men and women, whether they are at the perpetrating end or the receiving end.

    More to the point, the problem is my current needlessly defensive position in all my interations with women. It is not the same as that purported defensive position of women now. Any woman who ever came within a yard’s distance of me can now claim to have been violated by me and I have no defence against that!! What harm did I ever do to any woman? Yet, some people still have the cruelty to poke fun at those apparently shy boys who can’t manage to even look at girls! I am sure some of them, poor chaps, are frightened to death by the prospect. Naturally, with such artificial stresses, what can you expect but deranged and hypernoid boys on the rise? Kudos Feminism!

    Sex without explicit free consent constitutes rape, but only when it is man on woman, apparently! I am actually wondering how many of the readers actually have had sex with another person to understand the nuances of the act. Is it possible that a man who is tired from the day’s work can be forced into sex by his woman partner? Is it? No, I got to be kidding to be so sacrilegious as to claim thousands, if not millions, of rapes against men in the world each day! Have you ever heard of a man reporting being raped in India? That’s got to be the irrefutable evidence! That’s got to be the statistics, right?! So much for simplistic views …

    It is quite conceivable that while these modern women keep a constant watch out for those prying eyes, and the modern men, no doubt, trying equally hard to beat the vigil, in this eternal “game” of cat and mouse, they will all be inundated by the rising seas! Good riddance!!

    At the end of it, there is very little display of the responsibility needed or an awareness about the magnitude of difficulty in thinking for others, by those who are apparently in the field for it. And that scares the hell out of me, and I believe, any sane person, really!

    It is said that a television is like an idiot-box while a book apparently let’s one develop one’s thoughts. However, I haven’t seen any thoughts among the comments go beyond the sentences I wrote and into the broader view of things. Everybody wants to be spoonfed about events happening all around them and the direction of “progress”! Am I still stupid enough to expect that the others are not equally stupid?

    If a woman asks for equality, she is modern and there are many beautiful and newly coined words to describe her. If a man asks for equality, he is an idiot! Of course, he is truly a fool and an idiot for asking what there never has been, and what there never will be! But why there even was a doubt about who rule over who is a reflection of the all-pervading loveliness. Well, that’s the nature of things, isn’t it?! Peace!!

  8. Well, to address a few of the things in your comment, YouKnow, you aren’t the only person in the family to read my blog, though you are the only person who’s so outraged at the idea that I’m a feminist. My feminism’s no secret, really.

    I refuse to address things like ‘borrowed sadness’, simply because I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about!

    I will, however, defend the current post: when a group of women get together, in an unprecedented gesture, to take direct action against sexual harassment, yes, it is a cause for celebration. I feel joy when I read about it, and I express it on my blog. If you don’t like it, you’re free to say so, but not to tell me I shouldn’t be happy about it.

    I suggest you do a little wider reading on the DV Act. I will post about it, but not immediately.

    The fact that people are carrying on a conversation with you and not taking it beyond issues that have already been raised, does not make them stupid. It makes them to-the-point and articulate.

    I would like to thank you for giving me the chance to write about feminism; it’s rather a favourite topic, and your comment makes it clear that explaining feminism cannot be done too often. Expect a few posts on the topic soon.

  9. […] to write something similar. In different circumstances, of course: those of you who’ve seen the commentspace on the previous post already know […]

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